Fun run?

Today, I ran.  Not for speed, nor for distance.  I didn't turn on my GPS.  I didn't time myself.  I had no distance goal.  I just ran.

And it was fun.

A couple of weeks ago a coworker lent me a book he'd just finished reading:  Born to Run.  It had been sitting on my desk, untouched, ever since.  I don't read much anymore.  I like reading, but there are so many other things I fill my time with.  I don't generally have time available while in an environment suitable for reading quietly.  But last night I was kind of bored and decided I might as well start reading.  I was feeling pretty good about my 18 mile run on Sunday morning (which went great, by the way -- perfect temperature, cloudy sky, moderately windy, and my pace was good despite the fact that for the last few miles my hamstrings were painfully tight, which is why I didn't go for 20) and, apparently, in the mood for reading about running.

I should have been asleep by 9pm at the latest.  I finally finished the book at 11pm.  And although I then went to bed, I was actually chomping at the bit to put on my shoes and go running.  Which, you know, is weird, because although I've been doing more running than I ever though I'd willingly do, it's not been my favorite thing ever.  It's been uncomfortable and hard, and I've only been doing it because I felt I was afraid I couldn't finish the marathon fast enough otherwise.

But all day today I thought about getting off work and putting on my running shoes and just hitting the trail to see what would happen if I ran just to run.  No iPod, no MiCoach, no timer.  Just grab my water bottle and run as long as I felt like running.  I'd never run just for the sake of running before.  I wanted to know if my overweight, out of shape body could actually have fun running.

So I did. 

I parked my car, tied the car door key to my shoe, put everything else but my water bottle and phone in the trunk, and started running.  And for the first time ever, I wasn't thinking about how much time or distance I had left, what my pace should be, or how to spread the effort over the distance.  It was just one foot in front of the other, head up, only focused on the moment. 

Since the trail is marked off in 1/4 mile increments, though, I can tell you that I ran about 5/8 of a mile, walked about 1/4 mile, and then ran the entire remainder of the 1 1/2 mile loop. 

I was back at the parking lot before I had a chance to get bored.  I was relaxed, the way I used to be after a really long walk.  Despite the fact that it's been months since I ran more than 1/4 mile in a single interval, I didn't feel exhausted or even that sweaty, to be honest.  Finally, I had run without my brain babysitting my body.  I had actually enjoyed the run.

So thanks to Jason's book recommendation, I finally feel like my head is in the right place to finish up my training and line up at the starting line.  And yes, I know that I didn't suddenly gain the miraculous ability to run farther and enjoy it more just because I read an inspirational book.  I know that my ability to run has improved because, well, I've been running.  Duh.  And it's not that I didn't know how to enjoy running before.  I just never thought about the fact that, you know, I could.  Or should.  Because until last night, this was never about running.  This was about pushing myself through to the end of something, just to get to the end, just to prove that I could stick it out through the drudgery.  It wasn't supposed to be fun.  I assumed it was supposed to be hard and uncomfortable.  I assumed that people who say they love running really mean that they love the results they get from running.  But today I learned that even I can actually enjoy running.

And I've decided that, outside my weekend long runs, I'm abandoning a training schedule.  I'm going to stop worrying about how many miles I should or shouldn't be putting in per week.  I'm going to forget about speed work or interval training.  No more number crunching.  I'm just going to go out each day and run whatever distance I feel like running that day. 

Just for the fun of it.